It was a warm and muggy evening. My architect had given me some last minute work to do around 4:30, so I stayed due to the urgency. I finish up around 6 and go to drop it off, he's already left. Must not have been so urgent.
I walk out to my car, hit the keyless and start her up to hear the groan of the 300 horses. I may have smiled just a bit, unknowing the events that would strike upon me as I went home that night.
435 is the usual thunderdome, on the bannister onramp I get cutoff by a guy trying to get on the ramp before I go by. He gets passed in the other lane, and I merge onto the highway no problem. Again, more usual, slow cars in the far left lane and a couple imports or crotch rockets try to pass in the right, only to be blocked off, then surge up... blocked off, then surge up...
I am listening to a CD, cruising home and up finally to a clear spot devoid of traffic. Thats when I see it. My arch nemesis. This is the thing that gets me more than anything. The VERY slow car in the lane. We're not talking 60 in a 65... we're talking 45-65.
As I crawl up behind the 20-30 cars pinned behind it, I take a look at the other lanes. 2 semi's that seem to be welded together in the center and right lanes, and then 10 cars peppered behind them, with the main train behind mister no-go. I sit tight thinking he'll move, but after 2 tortured miles at 45mph, I decide I'll go the ricer route of surge and denial.
Whipping over to the far right lane, I switch back and forth till I am behind the offending semi. He is in the slow lane, as he should be, no harm, no foul. I need to get by this though, so I survey my options. Blue super duty agitated by center lane semi looks erratic, not tangling with him. Far left lane still blocked, and then a couple of lemming left laners fill in the center, so I am caught.
The glimmer of hope seemed like a trick, taking 2 repetitions before I realized my luck had changed. It was a turn signal. The semi in front of me was exiting @ 350. My right foot hit the gas pedal, anxious for the impending strip of hungered highway waiting for the snack of my pirellis. As he clears by, I give it all she's worth, and fly by him.
Like a NASCAR victory lap, I speed past all of the inferior cars, laughing at their dismay of still being caught behind Mr. Hyundai. It's a metro looking guy, jabbing on his cellphone, and playing with a gps... i give thought to doing the old quick brake check to get him to wake up, but decide he isn't worth any more of my time. I quicken my pace as to liberate my speed deprived foreminutes.
The challenger then appears. I thought nothing when passing him. A dark blue brand new super duty. A substantial beast to say the least, but his size and lack of power are it's downfall on the autobahn of KC. So I thought. As he falls in right behind me in the far left lane, I speed even more to give him some space, but he keeps gaining. I decide to let the intruder pass, not wanting to track any higher into the low 3 digit number I am now enjoying.
I click my signal up, and look to the side to see him scorch by me, turbocharger whistling at me teasing my timid pony for falling behind. I can't see him anymore though, a further scan shows he isn't around at all. Puzzled, I look in my rear view.
He is DIRECTLY behind me, centered up like a torpedo, ready to strike. He's so close, I'm not mad, but upset on how to relieve my car from the imminent danger of 4 tons of powerstroke up my new trunk. Before I can think another thought, it's Christmas again.
The blue and reds were like the semi's turn signal. I couldn't believe it at all. It took a few flashes to settle in, but I enjoyed the time, a very pretty compliment to the large pickup almost in tow. I am then crushed, an already bad day that has now sunk to the depths of what I can take. I pull over, turn the car off, roll down the windows, and put the keys on the dash.
It's an older man, probly in his prime from the era that my car was designed from. He steps up slowly in uniform. Having seen this picture numerous times before, I accept my fate. LARGE speeding ticket coming to this one. He stops at the rear of the car, checks out the temp tag, and then follows up the the window to converse.
Can I see your drivers license please?
*Hands him the DL*
So I betcha you know why I pulled you over, huh?
Yes sir, yes I do.
*Looks at DL, asking if I still live in Cameron, I reply no, Liberty.*
Thing is probly brand spankin new, huh?
Pretty much... I'm so sorry Sir.
Well, how's she run?
Puzzled, I answer: "Well, you saw, pretty well!"
He flashes a smile as I apologize again.
That's okay son, I was young once upon a time myself. Now be careful, you never know when you're passing a cop in a truck. He gives me another smile, and hands me back my license.
Now you have a good night.
Thank you Sir...oh thank you so much...
I set the cruise at 65 for the rest of the ride home. And I thank the Lord that people like that still exist in the world. He could have hung me out to dry... and all I got was a smile, with a tender warning, like a grandpa telling you softly when you've wronged in childhood.
-Joel